Sunday, 7 September 2014

How the system changed from matriarchal to patriarchal

At the beginning Gikuyu people enjoyed a matriarchal system. But somehow the system changed from matriarchal to patriarchal.

It is said that while holding superior position in the community, the women became domineering and ruthless fighters. They also practise polyandry. And, through sexual jealously, many men were put to death for committing adultery or other minor offences. Besides the capital punishment, the men were subjected to all kinds of humiliation and injustice.

Men were indignant at the way in which the women treated them, and in their indignation they planned to revolt against the ruthless women's administration of justice. But as the women were physically stronger than the man of that time, and also better fighters, it was decided that the best time for a successful revolt would be during the time when the majority of women, especially their leaders, were in pregnancy.

The decision was hailed by the men who were very anxious to overthrow the rule of the opposite sex. At once the men held a secret meeting in which they arranged a suitable date to execute their plan. On the day appointed to carry out the initial stage of the revolt, the men started to act enthusiastically. They embarked on a campaign to induce the women leaders and a majority of their brave followers to have sexual intercourse with men. The women were unfortunately deceived by the flattery of the men, and blindly agreed to their inducements without without knowing the wicked plan the men had made to overthrow the women's rule.

The men, after completing the first act, quietly waited for the result. After six moons had elapsed the men then saw clearly that their plan had materialised. At once they organised into groups and finally carried out the revolt without much resistance. For the brave women were almost paralysed by the condition in which they are. The men triumphed, took over the leadership in the community and became the heads of their families instead of the woman. Immediately steps were taken to abolish the system of polyandry and to establish the system of polygamy.

(the tribal legend about the origin of the Gikuyu system of kinship)
Facing Mt. Kenya
By Jommo Kenyatta

Friday, 5 September 2014

Relationship vs Love

First of all, there is no such thing as being isolated. To be is to be related and without relationships there is no existence. 

Relationship is an interconnected challenge and response between two people.

The relationship of two people creates society; society is not independent of you and me.

Relationship is the awareness of interconnection between two people.

Relationship is generally based on mutual gratification. 

Are you in communion with your wife? Perhaps you are physically but that is not relationship. You and your wife live on opposite sides of a wall of isolation. You have your own pursuits, your ambitions, and she has hers. You live behind the wall and occasionally look over the top—and that you call relationship. 

Thus relationship is sought where there is a mutual satisfaction, gratification; when you do not find that satisfaction you change relationship; either you divorce or you remain together but seek gratification elsewhere or else you move from relationship to another till you find what you seek—which is satisfaction, gratification, and a sense of self-protection and comfort.

So relationship invariably results in possession, in condemnation, in self-assertive demands for security, for comfort and for gratification, in that there is naturally no love.

If there is real relationship between two people, which means there is communion between them, then the implications are enormous. Then there is no isolation; there is love and not responsibility or duty.

Relationship is really a process of self-revelation, which is a process of self-knowledge; in that revelation there are many unpleasant things, disquieting, uncomfortable thoughts, activities. Since I do not like what I discover, I run away from a relationship which is no pleasant to a relationship which is pleasant. Therefore, relationship has very little significance when we are merely seeking mutual gratification but becomes extraordinarily significant when it is a means of self-revelation and self-knowledge. 

When you love, that is when you give yourself over to something entirely , wholly, then there is no relationship. 

If you do love, if there is such a love, then it is a marvellous thing. In such love there is no friction, there is no the one and the other, there is complete unity. It is a state of integration, a complete being.

There can be true relationship only when there is love but love is not the search for gratification. Love exist only when there is self-forgetfulness, when there is complete communion, not between one or two, but communion with the highest; and that can only take place when the self is forgotten.

On Relationship
The First and Last Freedom
J. Krishnamurti

Tuesday, 2 September 2014

Life is nothing but relationship

"Though relationship is painful we cannot run away, by means of isolation, by becoming a hermit and so on."
"Life is nothing but relationship."


"Love is the only thing that is eternally new."

The First and Last Freedom
by J. Krishnamurti